


why not take the rest?

by bmblb



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: M/M, Pre-Captain America: Civil War (Movie)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-20
Updated: 2018-09-20
Packaged: 2019-07-14 13:59:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 817
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16041890
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bmblb/pseuds/bmblb
Summary: Sometimes, he’d let Steve get close. A street away, a few minutes too late; the scent of him still lingering, as if to mock him, or reassure him, or warn him.Once, he even let him catch up.





	why not take the rest?

Bucky knew they were following him.

Sometimes, he’d let Steve get close. A street away, a few minutes too late; the scent of him still lingering, as if to mock him, or reassure him, or warn him. 

Once, he even let him catch up. 

It was Prague, within the winding streets of Old Town Square. He was looking up at the Orloj, cap pulled low over his face, hair tied loosely against his neck.

When Steve saw him, his heart practically dropped into his shoes. He made quick, deliberate steps towards him, through the flurry of Friday afternoon tourists. By the time he reached him, his throat had gone dry, and he couldn’t even begin to think of what to say.

They stood in silence, Bucky still looking at the clock, Steve not even trying to be subtle about giving him a repeated once-over. He was recently showered, light stubble covering his cheeks. He had a field backpack securely buckled over his abdomen. His blue Henley and jeans were slightly rumpled, but clean. He had a grim expression on his face that didn’t ease when he finally spoke.

“I’m not coming in.”

Steve blinked at him for a few seconds, before his mind caught up with him and he hurried to reply. “That’s -- that isn’t necessary, Buck. That’s not why I’m here.”

Bucky spared him a first glance. His eyes were searching; his eyebrows were furrowed. “I remember some things,” he admitted. It was quiet, but it still hit Steve hard. “But things are different now. You understand? I’m not the same.”

He took a shaky breath, looking back at the clock. Steve stared at him mutely. “I’m all messed up, like you wouldn’t believe. I don’t remember everything, Steve.”

His name leaving Bucky’s mouth spurred him into action. He turned to face Bucky completely. “Let me help you then. Let me be there for you. I _want_ to be there for you, Bucky, you--”

“You can’t,” he snapped. He swallowed, closed his eyes. Softer, “You can’t. I have to do this myself. I know you won’t stop, you bull-headed son of a bitch, but.” -- and that was such a Bucky thing to say that Steve felt faint, like he was in his living room in 1938, Bucky just home from work and standing at their stove, throwing things into a pot and praying it tastes anything like his mama’s, just a touch of home in a new house -- “You gotta know I have to do this on my own. You’ve seen the files. You know what I’m capable of. I have to do this on my own.”

Steve felt so overwhelmed with emotion he was sick with it. He said, “I wish you’d let me help you. You don’t scare me, Bucky.”

When Bucky looked at him again, his mouth was curled in an unpleasant smile. “You _should_ be scared of me, Rogers. _I’m_ scared of me.” He tugged at the glove covering his left hand meaningfully. 

“Take a break for yourself,” Bucky said. “Now that you know I’m in one piece. You won’t be able to catch up with me unless I want you to.”

It wasn’t a brag as much as it was a statement of fact. Steve reached into his back pocket quickly, not missing the immediate tension it brought to Bucky’s shoulders. He pulled out a small, nondescript flip phone. Hurriedly, he opened it up, pressing a few buttons that were much too small for his fingertips.

When he looked up, Bucky was looking about ready to take off. He held up the phone. “This thing has my number programmed into it. It’s the only contact.” When Bucky opened his mouth, Steve continued quickly, “No one else has this number, no trackers, nothing. I bought this just in case I could ever give it to you. I don’t even know the number, I haven’t looked, so I won’t call you.”

He held it out, eyes pleading. “If you need anything, _anything_ , call me, or text me. If you know how. I’ll answer, any time. You need me there, I’ll drop everything and go.”

Bucky’s mouth was pressed into a flat line, but something Steve said must’ve gotten through, because he took it from him into his gloved fingertips. Just the brush of their hands was enough to send a relieved shiver through Steve’s spine.

“I probably won’t use this,” Bucky warned, looking him in the eye as he pocketed it, “But... guess only time will tell. Take a break, Steve. I mean it.” And with a firm nod, he turned on his heel and disappeared into the crowd.

Steve stood there for what could be an hour, trying resolutely to keep himself from breaking down in the middle of bustling Old Town. Finally, he turned on the earpiece sat snugly in his ear.

“Hey, Sam. What's your opinion on the Amalfi Coast?”

**Author's Note:**

> this is the first time ive published something in forever! sorry its so short lol


End file.
